(6/8) Pure and Foul Ego

His Divine Grace Om Vishnupad
Srila Bhakti Nirmal Acharya Maharaj
Basirhat, 17 December 2020, noon, part 6
Translated from Bengali

It is said:

কনক-কামিনী প্রতিষ্ঠা-বাঘিনী
ছাড়িয়াছে যারে সেই ত বৈষ্ণব

kanaka-kamini, pratistha-baghini,
chhadiyachhe yare sei ta vaisnava

'Those who have given up money, women, and fame are the true Vaishnavs.'

(Vaishnav Ke?, Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakur)

Somebody can give up kanak (money), somebody can give up kamini (women), but one cannot give up pratistha (desire for name and fame). We are told that we must establish ourselves in the ego of a devotee ('Vaisnavi pratistha tate kara nistha (বৈষ্ণবী প্রতিষ্ঠা তাতে কর নিষ্ঠা). Firmly establish yourself as a servant of the Lord' (Vaishnav Ke?'). What does this mean? We must not be jealous. Somebody thinks, 'They have put a garland on his neck, but they have not given a garland to me!' For example, there are three sannyasis sitting here, but they put a big garland on my neck, so the other two sannyasis can think, 'Oh, but they did not give a big garland to me. I am also a maharaj!' They cannot tolerate another person's pratistha (fame). 'Vaisnavi pratistha tate kara nistha (বৈষ্ণবী প্রতিষ্ঠা তাতে কর নিষ্ঠা): firmly establish yourself as a servant of the Lord' (Vaishnav Ke?').

When Ksir-chor Gopinath stole ksir for Madhavendra Puri, Madhavendra Puri thought, 'If anybody gets to know in the morning that the Lord has stolen ksir for me, I will become famous and everybody will start offering me obeisances!' He became so scared that he ran away to Puri. But by the time he reached Puri, the news had travelled there before him: when he came there, everybody already knew about it and offered obeisances to him. If anybody envies this, it is not good. It is necessary to be firm and fixed in a Vaishnav's fame.

One time, when I was driving in a car, I saw a disciple who used to stay at our temple. I told him, 'Come with me for preaching.' We went to Nasigram (Bhatar district). People do not understand it – they think, 'Oh, Maharaj is eating posta bora (white poppy fritters)!' (White poppy [posta] is very expensive.) We all sat on the floor, and when they were distributing posta bora, they gave it to everyone, but they put a big one on my plate. The devotee whom I took with me did not like it. He thought, 'When they give garlands, they give him the biggest one. When they give posta bora, they give him the biggest one, too!' After taking prasad, we crossed the Damodar River and went for another preaching programme to an area where only govinda-bhog rice is cultivated [a fine kind of rice, mostly used for sweet rice preparations]. When we came there, they gave us ten–twelve maund (373-448 kg) of govinda-bhog rice. I left one maharaj there, saying, 'There is still some collection left in this area, please finish it here.' In the morning, we went for a parikrama, and on our way people gave us more govinda-bhog rice. When we later met the maharaj I had left behind, the disciple who I took with us asked that maharaj, 'Maharaj, have you not collected anything?'

'I have!' he replied.

'Oh, where is the rice then? How much have you got?'

'We have collected about twenty-five or thirty kilograms of rice.'

'And we have got twenty times more!' the disciple said. Then, he turned to me and said, 'Maharaj, do you understand now why they give big posto bora to you?'

I asked my godbrother who heard this conversation, 'What is going on?'

'Maharaj,' he said, 'they were giving big posta bora to you yesterday, and he has become proud because of that.'

'Sis! He should have told me, I would not have eaten it then – I would have given it to him. I did not know he would take it this way.'

That is why it is said:

প্রতিষ্ঠাশা আসি' হৃদয় দূষিবে
হইব নিরয়গামী ॥২॥

pratisthasa asi' hrdaya dusibe
haiba nirayagami [2]

'My heart will become polluted with the desire for prestige, and I will end up in hell.'

(Sri Kalyan-kalpataru, Srila Bhaktivinod Thakur)

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Language: Bengali

READ OTHER PARTS:

1) Gurudev's Great Mercy
2) Thwarted At the End
3) Unfavourable Urges and Thorns
4) Five Diseases
5) Live as Servant
6) Pure and Foul Ego
7) Worshipping Prasad
8) Guru-Varga's Hidden Treasure