(2/8) Thwarted At the End

His Divine Grace Om Vishnupad
Srila Bhakti Nirmal Acharya Maharaj
Basirhat, 17 December 2020, noon, part 2
Translated from Bengali

নিজকর্ম্ম-দোষে, এ দেহ হইল,
ভজনের প্রতিবন্ধ ॥৩॥

nija-karma-dose, e deha haila,
bhajanera pratibandha [3]

'Because of my own sins, this body has become an impediment to spiritual practice.'

(Saranagati, Srila Bhaktivinod Thakur)

As the result of my own actions, this body has become an obstacle to practising Krishna consciousness: I have become old now, and I do not like practising spiritual life; when I try to chant the Holy Name, my hand pains and trembles. There is one man staying in Tarakeshwar – I asked him, 'Why are you not chanting the Holy Name?' He said, 'Oh, my hand is paining.' I told him, 'Then chant with your mouth, or is your mouth paining, too?' You did not practise when you were young, and now that you are old, you do not want to practise.

You are always troubled: for example, if you cannot eat prasad full stomach, your stomach starts making noise. There are many services at the temple, but you cannot do it. Do you know why some people cannot do much? Because their bodies are very fat. They are not used to working, so when they do something, they have to struggle more to do something.

It is necessary to be habituated to working. That is why you should wake up early in the morning (at four o'clock in the morning), offer mangala-arati, then cook, feed the Lord; then, cook again at noon, offer bhog, do bhoga-arati; in the afternoon, offer some fruit or a snack; and then again do that (cook, offer bhog, do the arati) in the evening. But now at the temples, you must always keep somebody for each person (each person needs an assistant)...

In Nrisingha Palli, too, they do puja at noon, eat and then go to sleep, and they cannot wake up at four in the afternoon. I had to keep one more person there to offer bhog at four in the afternoon. There is no way out because there are two altars in Nrisingha Palli. If the pujari wakes up late, the second person does the offering in the afternoon, and the pujari does the puja and kirtans in the evening. It is also necessary to take care of the construction workers, so now that there are two of them, one of them can rest. It is necessary to take care of everything – Deity worship is a very difficult service.

I wrote in the book (Guidance 4) also that cooking is an even higher service than Deity worship. Mahaprabhu is more pleased with cooking service. It is necessary to cook with heart and soul. 'I have cooked this today, and tomorrow I will cook even better. I will feed the Lord even better. I will make more preparations next time.' One Didi came from Australia and cooked sweet rice – she cooked it so well! I will give some service to each of the devotees this time at Gurudev's festival. I have also asked the devotees to make posta bora (white poppy fritters) for all the sadhus; and they will also make fried rice (veg pulao) and chilli paneer. I have arranged for natural ghee for cooking (there is a disciple who makes it, so I have asked him to supply it for the festival). It is necessary to serve Vaishnavs well. Everybody eats dal and rice, but we want to make very nice, neat arrangement for Vaishnavs on Gurudev's day. When devotees do service, I feel satisfied, and Gurudev is also pleased when devotees do service. I can understand now what Gurudev wants. Gurudev is giving me inspiration.

So, it is said in the kirtan, 'As the result of my own actions, my body has become an obstacle to practising spiritual life.' I can feel that too – I cannot sit on the ground now, and the more time passes, the more problems appear. As the result of my own actions, my body has become an obstacle to practising spiritual life. Srila Bhaktivinod Thakur is telling the truth very nicely. We say, 'Oh, I am practising Krishna consciousness!' but what does Srila Bhaktivinod Thakur say? 'I cannot practise Krishna consciousness!'

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Language: Bengali

READ OTHER PARTS:

1) Gurudev's Great Mercy
2) Thwarted At the End
3) Unfavourable Urges and Thorns
4) Five Diseases
5) Live as Servant
6) Pure and Foul Ego
7) Worshipping Prasad
8) Guru-Varga's Hidden Treasure