Deserve, Then Desire

His Divine Grace Om Vishnupad
Srila Bhakti Nirmal Acharya Maharaj
Singur, noon programme
14 February 2021, part 2
Translated from Bengali

There is also another kirtan—if you chant kirtans and practise properly, and if you try to understand the meanings of kirtans, you will see how beautiful they are.

[His Divine Grace chants 'Krpa kara Vaisnava Thakura'.]

কৃপা কর বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর ।
সম্বন্ধ জানিয়া ভজিতে ভজিতে
অভিমান হউ দূর ॥

krpa kara vaisnava thakura
sambandha janiya bhajite bhajite
abhimana hau dura

"O Vaishnav Thakur! Please be merciful! Knowing the true relationship I will worship You and my ego will go far away."

Many think they have taken initiation, so they have become Vaishnavs. It is not so. When you know the relationship and keep practising, your ego will go away. That is why Gurudev and Srila Prabhupad (Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakur) said that there is no use living for one hundred years. Many are proud, "Oh, my father has lived to one hundred years!" What is the use? If somebody lives only ten years, but chants the Holy Name during this time, they will get some benefit. Yet if somebody lives for one hundred years and does not chant the Holy Name, what benefit will they get? What is the point living one hundred years if you cannot practise Krishna consciousness, if you cannot worship and serve the Lord? There is no use. That is why it is necessary to know the relationship (sambandha). If somebody took initiation only yesterday, you must address them as Prabhu. If you pay obeisance to everyone, then your ego will go away. When you see each other, you must tell each other, "Prabhu, dandavat," "Hare Krishna, Prabhu. Dandavat." We must be like this. It is necessary to know the relationship. What is this relationship? The relationship is that "You are my Prabhu [master], and I am your das [servant]." It is necessary to understand this relationship. The Lord lives within everyone. Even common people say that God lives within each human being, but why only human being? The Lord is there in every single living entity, be it a tree or any other entity. The Lord stays within every entity in a subtle form (as Paramatma). So, if I learn and understand this relationship, my ego will go away and I will never think that I have become a Vaishnav. What am I? I am a servant of Vaishnavs (Vaishnav das)—I am a servant of the servant of Vaishnavs. I am Vaishnav's menial worker. This is my identity. Mahaprabhu says that the jiva soul is an eternal servant of Krishna. Not just for one day, one hour, or two hours. Yet when you forget it, Maya grasps you:

'কৃষ্ণ-নিত্যদাস'—জীব তাহা ভুলি' গেল ।
এই দোষে মায়া তার গলায় বান্ধিল ॥

'krsna-nitya-dasa'—jiva taha bhuli' gela
ei dose maya tara galaya bandhila

"When the jiva soul makes the mistake of forgetting that it is an eternal servant of Krishna, Maya captures the soul by its neck."

(Sri Chaitanya-charitamrita, Madhya-lila, 22.24)

That is why we sing here [His Divine Grace resumes chanting the kirtan],

কৃপা কর বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর ।
সম্বন্ধ জানিয়া ভজিতে ভজিতে
অভিমান হউ দূর ॥

krpa kara vaisnava thakura
sambandha janiya bhajite bhajite
abhimana hau dura

"O Vaishnav Thakur! Please be merciful! Knowing the true relationship I will worship You and my ego will go far away."

'আমি ত বৈষ্ণব' এ বুদ্ধি হইলে
অমানী না হ'ব আমি ।
প্রতিষ্ঠাশা আসি' হৃদয় দূষিবে
হইব নিরয়গামী ॥

'ami ta vaisnava' e buddhi haile
amani na ha'ba ami
pratisthasa asi' hrdaya dusibe
haiba nirayagami

"If I think, 'I am a Vaishnav,' then I will never stop expecting honour from others—my heart will become polluted by the desire for fame and I will end up in hell."

কৃপা কর বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর ।

krpa kara vaisnava thakura

"O Vaishnav Thakur! Please be merciful!"

What does this mean? You think you have become a Vaishnav, but:

ব্রহ্মাণ্ড ভ্রমিতে কোন ভাগ্যবান্ জীব ।
গুরু-কৃষ্ণ-প্রসাদে পায় ভক্তিলতা-বীজ ॥

brahmanda bhramite kona bhagyavan jiva
guru-krsna-prasade paya bhakti-lata-bija

"Having travelled throughout the universe and got the mercy of Guru, Krishna, a fortunate soul receives a seed of the devotional creeper."

(Sri Chaitanya-charitamrita, Madhya-lila, 19.151)

What must you do when you get this seed? Do you think you have got the seed and this is it? When you plant a potato, you must water it after that. This water is sravan (listening, keeping good association) and kirtan (chanting, practising). Last Sunday, foreign devotees asked me, "What is bad association?" What do the scriptures and Srila Prabhupad say? There are nine kinds of devotion—sravanam, kirtanam, smaranam, archanam, vandanam, dasyam, sakhyam, atma-nivedanam, pada-sevanam (hearing, chanting, remembering the Lord, serving the Lord's lotus feet, worshipping the Deity of the Lord, rendering service as a servitor, as a friend, self-submission, and offering obeisance). If somebody does not practise even one of these nine types of devotional practices, their association is bad. You must practise at least one of these practices—you must practise sravan (listen to sadhus, listen about the Lord), you must practise kirtan (chant the Holy Name and practise properly), you must practise smaran (remember the Lord), you must practise vandan (offer obeisances and prayers to the Lord), you must practise archan (worship the Deity of the Lord), and so on. If somebody does not practise even one of these practises, you must never associate with them.

I went to a house last night. For many years, they have been distributing prasad to thousands and thousands of people, arranging Nama-yajna, chanting kirtans, giving class on Bhagavatam, and so on, but what is the result now? I have seen that now there is no service to the Deities, there is no service to the Lord, there is no practice! They have been doing Nama-aparadh, Nama-aparadh, Nama-aparadh, and the result is that the Lord is not staying there now—there is nothing there now. They have become full of offences.

What do sadhus come to do? Some come to take money, but some come thinking how they can bring people to this line. This is what "jive daya" (being kind to the souls) means. You can see now also—it is not like only initiated people have come here, there are many uninitiated people, and if they hear about the Lord, they will get some benefit. Those who are recording all their deeds will write in their dairies that one day they listened to Bhagavad-katha. It will give them benefit.

অসাধুসঙ্গে ভাই কৃষ্ণনাম নাহি হয় ।

নামাক্ষর বাহিরায় বটে তবু নাম কভু নয় ॥

asadhu-sange bhai krsna-nama nahi haya
namaksara bahiraya bate tabu nama kabhu naya

"Brother, the Name of Krishna never appears in bad association: the letters of the Name may appear, but the Name never does."

(Sri Sri Prema-vivarta, 7.1)

কোটি জন্ম যদি করে শ্রবণ কীর্ত্তন ।
তবু না পায় ব্রজেন্দ্রনন্দন ॥

koti janma yadi kare sravana kirtana
tabu na paya vrajendranandan

"If you practise hearing and chanting for millions of lives, you may still not get the Son of Nanda who dwells in Vraja."

Even if you chant like this and give class like this for millions of lives, but you will never get the Lord, because you are doing it with offences. Moreover, you will only go to hell. We were just singing now, "Your heart will become polluted with pratistha and you will end up in hell (pratisthasa asi' hrdaya dusibe haiba nirayagami)." You are so proud, "Oh, I am feeding people!", "I am arranging great festivals!" This desire for prestige will come to your heart and pollute it, and you will clear your road to hell. You will be feeding so many people, and through that you will be clearing the road to hell for yourself! I told them yesterday that they feed thousands of people, and they are getting pratistha because of that.

[His Divine Grace resumes chanting the kirtan.]

তোমার কিঙ্কর আপনে জানিব
'গুরু'-অভিমান ত্যজি' ।

tomara kinkara apane janiba
'guru'-abhimana tyaji'

"I will consider myself Your servant and give up the ego of a guru."

It is necessary to give up the ego that you are a guru or an acharya. That is why we do not allow anyone to touch our feet. Yesterday too, I was given prasad and the person was standing and only waiting when I finish to take my remnants—he did not care whether I needed anything. What have they learnt? What did Srila Gaura Kishor Das Babaji Maharaj do one time? He ate everything, along with the banana leaf plate! They gave him prasad two times, and Babaji Maharaj understood what was going on, so the second time he ate everything along with the plate!

তোমার কিঙ্কর আপনে জানিব
'গুরু'-অভিমান ত্যজি' ।
তোমার উচ্ছিষ্ট পদজলরেণু
সদা নিষ্কপটে ভজি ॥

tomara kinkara apane janiba
'guru'-abhimana tyaji'
tomara uchchhista pada-jala-renu
sada niskapate bhaji

"I will consider myself Your servant and give up the ego of a guru. I will always earnestly worship Your remnants, Your foot dust, the water that has washed Your feet."

কৃপা কর বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর ।

krpa kara vaisnava thakura

"O Vaishnav Thakur! Please be merciful!"

নিজে শ্রেষ্ঠ জানি' উচ্ছিষ্টাদি দানে
হবে অভিমান-ভার ।
তাই শিষ্য তব থাকিয়া সর্ব্বদা
না লইব পূজা কা'র ॥

nije srestha jani' uchchhistadi dane
habe abhimana-bhara
tai sisya tava thakiya sarvada
na laiba puja ka'ra

"If I, loving myself more than anyone else, bestow my remnants, etc. on others, then I will become filled with ego. Therefore, I will always remain Your disciple, I will not take worship from anyone."

What does "nija srestha jani" mean? You tell others, "Here, take this prasad," it is not good because you become proud then. Sometimes, there is no way out, and you have to tolerate so much danger. You can imagine how much danger a guru has to face. People give me sweets, but I have diabetes, I do not eat sweets, but they still push, "Oh, take a little." I pinch a bit and take, and they get happy because they say they now have my remnants. It is a big problem for me; I always feel I am an offender. They give me a whole plate full of sweets, but I do not even touch sweets, and if I take a pinch from there, they get happy and distribute my remnants to everyone. I can become proud because of this. That is why it is said in scriptures that we must always remain disciples. I will always be a disciple. How do scriptures say we must serve Vaishnavs? You cannot serve Vaishnavs without become a Vaishnav yourself. First become a Vaishnav yourself, then you can serve Vaishnavs. And if somebody thinks, "I have become a Vaishnav!" they must not do Vaishnav seva—their service will be faulty, it will be a mistake. "I am a fallen soul, do I have the right to serve Gurudev? Does a fallen soul like me have the right to serve Gurudev?! I do not have any right! I am a lowly person, how can I serve the Lord? I do not have any right to do any service." It is necessary to have such humility. How can you get this right to do service? The answer is here too. [His Divine Grace resumes chanting the kirtan.]

অমানী মানদ হইলে কীর্ত্তনে
অধিকার দিবে তুমি ।
তোমার চরণে নিষ্কপটে আমি
কাঁদিয়া লুটিব ভূমি ॥

amani manada haile kirtane
adhikara dibe tumi
tomara charane niskapate ami
kandiya lutiba bhumi

"When I become free from the desire for honour and be able to give honour to others, you will give me the right to chant Your kirtan. I will earnestly roll on the ground and cry at Your holy feet."

When will I get the right to chant kirtan? When I have no desire for respect to myself, and when I can give honour to others: "When I become lowly myself and when I can respect others, then, O Vaishanv Thakur!, you will give me the right to chant the glories and the Holy Name of Lord Krishna. Then, I will earnestly and eternally serve your lotus feet."

জয় বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর
জয় বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর
বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর
জয় বৈষ্ণব ঠাকুর

Jaya Vaisnava Thakur
Jaya Vaisnava Thakur
Vaisnava Thakur
Jaya Vaisnava Thakur

Doyal Vaisnava Thakur
Doyal Vaisnava Thakur
Vaisnava Thakur
Doyal Vaisnava Thakur

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