(4/14) Cry and Pray

His Divine Grace Om Vishnupad
Srila Bhakti Nirmal Acharya Maharaj
Uluberia, 12 January 2021, part 4
Translated from Bengali

কবে আমি ছাড়িব এ বিষয়াভিমান ।
কবে বিষ্ণুজনে আমি করিব সম্মান ॥

kabe ami chhadiba e visayabhimana
kabe visnu-jane ami kariba sammana

‘When will I give up this mundane ego? When will I give honour to the Lord’s devotees?’

গলবস্ত্র কৃতাঞ্জলি বৈষ্ণব নিকটে ।
দন্তে তৃণ করি’ দাঁড়াইব নিষ্কপটে ॥

gala-vastra krtanjali vaisnava-nikate
dante trna kari’ dandaiba niskapate

‘I will stand before a Vaishnav sincerely, with a cloth around my neck and joined palms, holding a straw between my teeth.’

(Sri Kalyan-kalpataru, Srila Bhaktivinod Thakur)

What will I do next? I will tell the Vaishnav about my sorrow. Prabhupad Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakur said that if you send a letter to the Lord, you will not get a reply, but if you submit your letter to the Lord’s representative, or delegate (gurudev), then you will get a reply.

Srila Visvanath Chakravarti Thakur says that gurudev is the Lord Himself. Moreover, Krishna Himself told Uddhav Maharaj, ‘Acharyam mam vijaniyan (আচার্য্যং মাং বিজানীয়ান্). Know that the acharya is non-different from Me.’ Acharya is the one who practises (achar) in his own life and who preaches (prachar). The Lord says, ‘Know the acharya to be My own self. He is non-different from Me.’ Srila Visvanath Chakravarti Thakur said:

সাক্ষাদ্ধরিত্বেন সমস্ত-শাস্ত্রৈ-
রুক্তস্তথা ভাব্যত এব সদ্ভিঃ ।
কিন্তু প্রভোর্যঃ প্রিয় এব তস্য
বন্দে গুরোঃ শ্রীচরণারবিন্দম্ ॥

saksadd-haritvena samasta-sastrair
uktas tatha bhavyata eva sadbhih
kintu prabhor yah priya eva tasya
vande guroh sri-charanaravindam

‘I offer my obeisance unto the lotus feet of Sri Guru, who is said by all scriptures to be, no doubt, the Supreme Lord Himself and considered to be such by pious souls but who is also, no doubt, the Lord’s dear associate.’

(Sri Sri Gurvastakam, Srila Visvanath Chakravarti Thakur)

On the one hand, the guru is the Lord Himself. On the other hand, the guru is the dearmost of the Lord. Who is the dearmost of the Lord? Radharani. Therefore, in madhura-rasa, gurudev is a form of Radharani. Alternatively, in sakhya-rasa or vatsalya-rasa, gurudev is non-different from Nitai or Balaram. Krishna and Balaram and Gaura and Nitai are two forms of the same body (eka deha-i, dui rupa; এক দেহই, দুই রূপ): They are one, but to perform Their pastimes, They become two. In either case, gurudev is the Lord Himself, and gurudev is very dear to the Lord. We must direct our prayers to gurudev: if you send a letter to gurudev asking about the Lord, he will tell you about Him. That is why it is said that it is necessary to know how to make proper enquiry:

তদ্­বিদ্ধি প্রণিপাতেন পরিপ্রশ্নেন সেবয়া ।
উপদেক্ষ্যন্তি তে জ্ঞানং জ্ঞানিনস্তত্ত্বদর্শিনঃ ॥

tad viddhi pranipatena, pariprasnena sevaya
upadeksyanti te jnanam, jnaninas tattva-darsinah

‘You will be able to attain knowledge by satisfying the divine master with submission, relevant enquiry and sincere service. The enlightened souls who are learned in scriptural knowledge and endowed with direct realisation of the Supreme Absolute Truth will impart divine knowledge to you.’

(Srimad Bhagavad-gita, 4.34)

Enquiry must be proper, not any nonsense enquiry. Gurudev is the Lord’s close associate. What must you come to tell him? You must come to tell him about your sadness, ‘My Lord, I cannot practise properly.’ ‘Gora pahu na bhajiya mainu (গোরা পহুঁ না ভজিয়া মৈনু). Instead of worshipping Gora, I have been merely dying!’

গোরা পহুঁ না ভজিয়া মৈনু ।
প্রম রতন-ধন হেলায় হারাইনু ॥
বিষয়-বিষম-বিষ সতত খাইনু ।
গৌরকীর্ত্তন রসে মগন না হৈনু ॥
কেন বা আছয়ে প্রাণ কি সুখ লাগিয়া ।
নরোত্তমদাস কেন না গেল মরিয়া ॥

gora pahu na bhajiya mainu
prema ratana-dhana helaya harainu
visaya-visama-visa satata khainu
gaura-kirtana rase magana na hainu
kena va achhaye prana ki sukha lagiya
narottama-dasa kena na gela mariya

‘I did not worship Gora’s feet, I did not care for the jewel treasure of divine love! I have lost my chance! I have always been taking the deathly poison of the material life and never felt attached to the ecstasy of Gaura’s kirtan. Why am I still alive? What joy is there in this life? Oh, why did Narottam Das not just die?…’

(Srila Narottam Das Thakur)

We are losing the chance to attain the highest transcendental love for the Lord! We must cry and tell this to our gurudev…

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Size: 49 Mb
Length: 101 min
Language: Bengali

READ OTHER PARTS:

1) What Is Surrender?
2) Proper Recipient for Proper Taste
3) Highest Stance
4) Cry and Pray
5) Seeking Respite
6) Greatest Choice
7) Nityananda Prabhu's Mercy
8) Mahaprabhu's Mercy
9) His Things, For His Service
10) Faith Is Not Idle
11) Devotion or Display?
12) Example to Follow
13) Shelter of Sri Guru's Mercy
14) Service or Offence?