(11/11) My Humble Prayer to You

His Divine Grace Om Vishnupad
Srila Bhakti Nirmal Acharya Maharaj
Adhivas of Srila B.R. Sridhar Dev-Goswami Maharaj's tirobhav
Sri Nrisingha Palli, 12 August 2018, morning, part 11
Translated from Bengali

We came here (to Sri Nrisingha Palli) on Monday. After that, on Tuesday, it was ekadasi. I took some prasad in the morning and went out to settle some bank matters. There is a saying in Bengali, 'Bhiksar chal kanda akanda (ভিক্ষার চাল কাঁড়া আকাঁড়া). Beggars cannot be choosers (lit. collected rice can be both husked and unhusked).' When we collect potato, we do not fuss – somebody can give good potato, somebody can give bad potato, some can give damaged potato...

When you always do service, you feel happy – you feel no trouble, no pain. We are not even conscious of any personal struggles. When you do and do service, your faults will go away. What are these faults? Mahaprabhu said:

গ্রাম্যকথা না শুনিবে, গ্রাম্যবার্ত্তা না কহিবে ।
ভাল না খাইবে আর ভাল না পরিবে ॥
অমানী মানদ হঞা কৃষ্ণনাম সদা ল'বে ।
ব্রজে রাধাকৃষ্ণ সেবা মানসে করিবে ॥

gramya-katha na sunibe, gramya-varta na kahibe
bhala na khaibe ara bhala na paribe
amani manada hana krsna-nama sada la'be
vraje radha-krsna seva manase karibe

'Do not listen to village talks, do not speak about village news. Do not eat fancy food, do not wear fancy clothes. Do not expect honour to yourself and give all respect to others. Always chant the Holy Name of Krishna and serve Radha-Krishna in your mind.'

(Sri Chaitanya-charitamrita, 3.6.236-237)

We should not be doing anything for ourselves. We sing in one of the kirtans also:

নিজের পোষণ কভু না ভাবিব
রহিব ভাবের ভরে ।

nijera posana, kabhu na bhaviba,
rahiba bhavera bhare

'I will never think about my own maintenance. I will always remain within the shelter of loving attachment for You.'

(Saranagati, Srila Bhaktivinod Thakur)

We will not think about ourselves.

Until mid-2005 I lived in the Seva Kunja building on the first floor because the doctors told me that I could not climb stairs after my operation. When I had the operation, I left the hospital the next day and went back to Nabadwip by a general train. I did not waste time. There are at least two festivals that get especially crowded, Gaura Purnima and Gurudev's Vyasa Puja. At Gaura Purnima 2005, there were so many people that all rooms had finished, and some of our own men were coming. What was I to do? I said, 'OK, take my room.' I lived on a bed outside the room during that time. I had my original room on the top floor, and I told the devotees to take it too. Devotees put mosquito nets all over the veranda and slept like that. I remember when it was mangal-arati time, they could not wake up. I had to shake them, 'Prabhu, wake up, wake up! We have to go to the mangal-arati!' I went for the mangal-arati and led the kirtan...

So many problems can come... After 2005, I went back to my old room on the fourth floor in Seva Kunja, and devotees from Siliguri would stay on the veranda outside my room – the whole floor would be full of mosquito nets. What could I do? They came in a bus, but they could not get room – at least they could stay on the veranda and use the bathrooms downstairs. In the morning, I had to close my eyes and just go through everybody's mosquito nets, lifting the nets and walking through everyone, to come to the mangala-arati. What will I say? I am only a guard. Even though I am a sannyasi, how can I stay comfortably in a room when everyone is struggling? Now you all come to this smaller house here. Some of you get the room, some do not. But there are bathrooms in each room, there are bathrooms downstairs also (outside). It is not a problem. You can stay on the veranda or here in the nat-mandir. If you rough it like that, then your ego and pride will go away. It is said plainly in the scriptures: 'You cannot get the Lord without struggle (kosta na karle Kesto pawa yay na).'

We must understand and learn these things. If you want to get the Lord, you have to put up with some struggle. We are not afraid to commit sin for our own pleasure, but when it comes to the Lord, we are afraid to do something because we think we can commit a sin. Stop thinking about your own happiness and always think only about the happiness of the Lord – always worry that the Lord may not get any problem.

I am praying to you all that you may never look at others' faults, that you may never discuss and criticise others. If you do that, all those faults you discuss and see in others will come to you. Guru Maharaj said that. If you criticise others, the fault that you see can come to you, that is why you must never see others' faults. Vaishnavs are adosa-darasi (they do not see anybody's faults). If you give any value to Vaishnavs' words, then you must not see others' faults, you must not talk about others. If somebody is doing something wrong, you can tell them, 'Prabhu, what you are doing is not right.' This is the right way. Tell to the person directly, do not talk about anybody behind their back – no scriptures tell us to do this. Sit down with the person and explain it to them, 'Prabhu, do not do this.' Then, the person will correct their behaviour.

“গোরার আমি, গোরার আমি” মুখে বলিলে নাহি চলে ।

গোরার আচার, গোরার বিচার লইলে ফল ফলে ॥

"gorara ami, gorara ami" mukhe balile nahi chale
gorara achara, gorara vichara la-ile phala phale

'Just saying, "I am Gora's! I am Gora's!" will not do. Only when you follow Gora's practice and Gora's conception will you get the proper result.'

লোক দেখান গোরা ভজা তিলক মাত্র ধরি ।

গোপনেতে অত্যাচার গোরা ধরে চুরি ॥

loka dekhana gora bhaja tilaka matra dhari'
gopanete atyachara gora dhare churi

'You put on tilaks and show the whole world that you serve Gora, but secretly you do outrageous things. Gora will catch you, thief (hypocrite)!'

(Sri Sri Prema-vivarta, 8.6-7)

Gora knows who you criticise. If you criticise or talk about others, you will not get anything by doing that. Always remember this. If you see others' faults and always think about it, then you will be a drain inspector. There are always dirty things in drains, so if you come to a drain, you will always get a bad smell. Never talk about such things. It is not your business to talk about others or criticise others and see their faults. If you see something, you can tell to the person, 'Prabhu, this is not right. Please do not do it.' Finished. Otherwise, you will sit and talk about others and your life will be gone before you know it. When will you get time to practise Krishna consciousness? You will never get, and can never get, any benefit by talking nonsense, by gossiping and talking about others. I am telling you with folded palms: please never speak about such things ever again. Please always remember this.

You can become removed from Krishna consciousness. You think, 'I do not want to stay with them. I would rather stay alone.' But Srila Prabhupad said, 'Reclusive, solitary practise is mere cheating.' You must sit at the class together with everyone, you must chant together with everyone, you must go for preaching together with everyone. Try to stay all together, and if anyone makes a mistake, tell them about it and try to bring them to the right path. In this way, you will get benefit.

Jay Srila Guru Maharaj ki jay
Harinam sankirtan ki jay

Please wake up early tomorrow. I will tell you about Srila Sridhar Dev-Goswami Maharaj tomorrow. I have told you many things today and will tell more tomorrow also. I am not telling anyone to fast tomorrow. If you can, it is good, you can do that. But I know that if I tell you to fast, you will start going outside and drinking tea outside. I do not like this. What am I to do then? It is better if you take prasad at the temple instead of going outside and eating outside things. If one tries, anybody can fast, anybody can follow ekadasi. It is not like it is not possible. The same is true about chanting: you cannot chant the Holy Name or you do not want to chant the Holy Name – which is true? We fast the whole day on Janmastami, but I always get to hear that people still buy something and eat. That is why I tell at the temples that after they make an offering to the Deities, they should distribute prasad (to those who cannot fast). If I tell you to fast tomorrow till twelve o'clock, you will say, 'Oh no, I cannot do that. It is too hard.' Then do not fast. I told the cook to make alur dum and offer it with muri, then you will not go outside to have tea and biscuits. Somebody can also have some health issues (diabetes, etc.), then they have to eat something in the morning. I have diabetes myself, so I have to take breakfast timely otherwise my sugar will fall, so how can I tell you all to fast then? If everybody can fast, it is good, but if you cannot, there is no need to eat secretly. If you do things secretly, it is not good. You say you do nirjal ekadasi (fast without even drinking water), but when you go bathing, you drink some water thinking nobody can see you. The Lord can see you. Do not be like that.

Jay Srila Guru Maharaj

[His Divine Grace then chants 'Sri Guru-charana-padma', 'Ohe Vaishnava Thakura', 'Parama Karuna', 'Hari Haraye Nama Krsna', recites Jaya Dhvani and concludes the evening class.]

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CLICK TO LISTEN TO THE LECTURE

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Length: 97 min
Language: Bengali

READ OTHER PARTS:

1) Genuine Relation with Sri Guru
2) Pleasing Gurudev
3) Giving Gurudev Place In Your Heart
4) Gurudev's Transcendental Care
5) Live In the World of Faith
6) Value Your Service Life
7) Power of Genuine Devotion
8) Give Wholesale Attention
9) Harmonising Wisely
10) Seva-Sprha
11) My Humble Prayer to You